Ballroom Dancing and Hell Advancing
by sour-cherry-scones
Summary: Simon and Baz are happy and adorable as can be, and going to a ball tonight. But something big is coming for them...Snowbaz, and Penelope. A bit of a drama/adventure.
1. Chapter 1

**Simon**

Penny grabs a bag of flour from the shelf. "So," she says, "you guys up to anything tonight?'

"Umm, we're going to a ball actually." I grab 3 packs of sugar and put them in the trolley.

"A ball!" Penny exclaims, and puts a pack of sugar back. "Why didn't you tell me before?" She asks.

"I don't know," I say sheepishly, "you didn't ask." She swats a pack of chocolate bars out of my hands. "Hhmph," she groans, "I was going to make a batch of spag bol with that mince we have left in the fridge, It'll go off if we leave it a day longer. I guess, I'll just have to eat it myself."

"Sorry Penny." I glance down at our trolley. No sour cherries, I'll have to go back and get some.

Penny softens a bit. "Oh, it's alright," she says, "you'll have fun, I guess, and your dancing can't improve if you don't do some every so often." She nudges my arm. "So where's it at, anyway?"

"I dunno really," I reply, "one of the Grimm family friends' castles or mansions maybe? Something like that. Baz was invited because they've known him all his life, and they just couldn't have the party without him there, apparently." Penny looks intrigued. "I don't see why if you ask me. They can't be that important, I've never even heard Baz talk about them before this."

"Hmm," Penny says, inspecting the back of a cereal box before tossing it in, "could be one of the Aristn's birthdays. I think I heard Mum say something about some Thelma-Louise Aristn turning some great figure when I visited."

"Yeah, maybe." We're in the chilled section by now, and I still need to get those cherries. "I'll be back," I tell Penny, "just need to grab something." I head off to the other side of the supermarket, and can feel my tail shifting around as I jog. It's whipping my skin slightly. Crowley, havings wings and a tail can get irritating sometimes.

 **Baz**

I'm reading on the couch when Snow and Bunce return, carrying armloads of groceries. They look pained, hauling them onto the bench. "Great Snakes," I say, getting up from my patch of cushions, "how much do you guys _eat_?" Bunce nudges Simon in the shoulder. "Don't blame me," she says, "Your boyfriend over here is the one who put most of it in. Can't stop himself when it comes to food, can he?" She laughs.

"Hey!" Snow says, looking slightly offended. His eyebrows shove together a bit in the middle. I can't help but think that he looks extremely cute. I still can't believe he's mine sometimes. I'd loved him and fantasised about him so long before we were together, that how it is now is still pretty amazing to me.

"So," Bunce starts, "I hear you two are hitting the town tonight."

"Oh yeah," I say, "I take it Snow's told you about the ball."

"Mmhmm. So who is it for, exactly?"

"Thelma-Louise Aristn. She turned 90 yesterday. Ever heard of her?"

"Yeah, that's what I thought," she mumbles to the bench, and then looks up, "She created the spell to cure the common cold, if I'm correct."

Bunce and I get into a little conversation about sickness spells in history, while we unpack the food. Snow starts to stuff his face as soon as we've put everything away, and a few crumbs remain around his lips. He looks so adorable I have to kiss him. "Hey, Simon." I slink past Penelope and put my arm around his waist.

"Hey," he says as his warm palm envelopes the back of my neck. Our lips meet and it feels so good. I can hear Bunce in the background ("ugh") as we push against each other harder, Snow now pressed against the stone bench. His body is so warm and soft against my cold surface, and it feels so good to just feel him against me. Feel his hand rake through my hair, and his nose smudge against mine. So good to feel his hectic curls through my own hand. So good just to be with Simon Snow. Simon Snow, the one I love so much. Simon Snow, the one who loves me. It's still so good, I can hardly believe it.

 _ **A/N: I just came up with this title and had to write this! More to come of this story. I hope you've enjoyed this, and please let me know what you think, and follow/fav if you've liked it. All rights for the characters and world to Rainbow Rowell. ;)**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Simon**

We pull up at the castle as the sun is setting. Yes, _castle._ It's enormous, and pretty bloody majestic and beautiful, too, I have to admit. It surprises me just how rich some of the people Baz and his family associate with are.

Baz takes my hand and leads me to the door. He's wearing his dark green suit (my favourite), and I'm wearing a fancy silver one he leant me. His hair is out, and falling in soft waves. I think he just left it like that because he knows I like it, even though the other people here would approve more of his slicked back look.

We're greeted at the door by a man in a tuxedo, and he lets us in with a smile and a 'good to see you Mr. Pitch'. Inside is almost better than the outside. Actually, no, it _is_ better than the outside. There are delicious looking shiny platters of food set out on the tables, and a grand chandelier hanging from the ceiling. There's even a small orchestra playing the music!

"Great snakes!" I say to Baz, "this is the fanciest place I've ever been. I thought your gothic mansion was bloody fancy as it gets until I saw this."

"Yeah," he replies, "it really is something else, isn't it? Oh look, there are my parents. I suppose we'd better go and say hello." He turns to me and asks "Are you ready?"

"Yeah. Let's go."

 **Baz**

Father looks mildly disgusted when we walk up, looking down at our entwined fingers, but acts polite anyway.

"Hello Basilton," he nods at Simon, "Mr. Snow."

I then say "Nice to see you Father," as Snow says, "Hi, ."

"I see you two are still… together," Father says. He always has to sound so repulsed when talking about us. And hesitant, like it's a topic that will do something ghastly to him if converses about it too lightly.

"Yes, and we won't be ending our relationship anytime soon," I say, and add, "if that's what you were hoping. Isn't that right, Simon?

"Yeah…" Simon looks scared. My Father always manages to intimidate him.

"Oh, no, that's not what I was implying." My father lies.

"We'll be off then," I say, and my Stepmother adds a quick greeting to us before we head off to another part of the dance floor.

Simon takes my other hand, "Well wasn't that a bit of fun," he says with a laugh. I tuck my arm around his waist. "I wish Father could just be accepting of us for once," I say with a sigh. "He is going to have to see your face forever. You know I'm never letting you go, Simon Snow."

He grins and I plant a small kiss on his lips. "Should we dance then?" He asks.

"If you can manage," I reply.

 **Simon**

We dance for a while to the enchanting sound of the orchestra. It really is enchanting, it makes me feel so good. I wonder if they put magic into it? Or maybe it's just that I always feel this way when I'm with Baz, and holding him, looking into his eyes and grinning at each other while we dance is just so good. He holds my waist and hand as we move, and I have my palm and fingers touching the back of his neck, and exploring the soft strands of hair that reside there. At some point Baz even mumbles something under the noise of the music, and kisses me. Right there in the middle of the dance floor. In front of all those people. Is this even allowed at such a formal event? I wouldn't have the faintest. But he does it anyway, even though his parents are probably watching too. They've could've been sneaking glances at us all night, for all we've noticed. We've been so caught up in each other, they could waltz up to us right now and inspect us as we kiss, and we wouldn't even have a clue.

I push my hand through his hair, soaking up the moment, getting the most of him that I can. I think I can feel eyes on my back, though, and I move into him for a few more seconds before breaking away.

I look around, and so does he. The whole room seemed to have been watching us, and I feel a little blush rise up in my cheeks. Maybe, that kind of thing isn't allowed at balls, after all. But nobody comes and tells us off straight away, most of them just go back to dancing and pretend nothing happened, as Baz grins at me. His face looks so adorable right now I just want to kiss him again. To hell with all the people! Our lips have just met once more,as we hear a loud clearing of throat beside us. I don't want to stop, but we do so anyway.

It's Baz' Dad. I'm trying to mentally prepare myself for what he's going to say, but just then, my phone rings in my pocket. Baz and his father both frown at me. "You have your phone with you at a ball?" Baz asks.

"No one told me not to," I shrug. I take it out of my pocket to see who it is. "It's Penny," I say to Baz, "you mind if I take it?"

"She's probably just going to lecture you about leaving the fridge open or something like that, but, yeah, take it if you want." I put it to my ear.

"Penny?" I say.

 _ **A/N: I hope you've enjoyed this chapter! There will be more soon and please give it a fav or review if you've liked it. ;)**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Simon**

"Simon!" Penny rushes out. "Look, you have to help me."

"What is it, Pen?" I ask. She sounds worried, which is unusual for her, so in control most of the time.

"Well," She starts, "I don't really know where I am."

"What!"

"Calm down, Simon. I didn't say I was in mortal peril, I'm just not sure of my whereabouts. But, actually...No, I mean yes. I could possibly be in mortal peril, because, I think I might have been kidnapped. I've just woken up."

"Okay. No, not okay. That's really not okay Penny. Do you have _any_ idea where you might be? Do you recognise it at all?" This comes out all at once. I'm starting to panic now. I'm sure Penny will be okay, she's a brilliant mage, but I can't help but worry for my best friend.

"No," she says. "It's just dark with no windows, a door, and a bed in the corner."

"Okay," I say, " _Okay_. That narrows it down a little bit I guess, because, honestly, who the _hell_ builds a room with no windows." Penny tries to let out a quiet laugh, I think, but it just sounds like a whimper.

"Okay, Pen. I'm gonna get Baz and we'll leave right away. We're going to find you, okay?"

"Okay, Simon. Thanks. I think I'll be alright for a little while. No one's shown their face yet."

"We'll find you Penny," I sigh, "I promise."

 **Baz**

Snow looks panicked, when he ends the call and walks back over. My Father is walking off by now, and Simon wraps a hand around my arm.

"Baz," he says, "we have to go. Now"

"Why?" I ask. I'll go with him anywhere, of course, I'm just want to know why he looks so worried.

"I think Penny might have been kidnapped.

"What?" I splutter.

"Penny. Kidnapped," he repeats, but I know what he said. I've become strangely fond of Bunce over the past year or so, and feel almost as worried for her as he looks right now.

"Okay," I grip his hand, "let's go."

 **Simon**

We get back in Baz' car and pull away from the castle. Baz looks over at me, "Where do you want to go?" he asks.

"I don't know," I say, "Maybe we should just go for a bit of a drive around the different parts of London and see if we can find a building with a windowless wall."

"That'll take a long time," he says, "and it's likely that there will be a few of them, but I don't have a better plan." He glances over with a reassuring smile. "I'm sure we'll find her," he says.

 **Baz**

Bloody hell, this is going to be difficult. I've just steered onto a main road, when Snow says something. "I can't believe this," he sighs, "I mean, who would want to take Penny? Who could do that!" And that gives me an idea. "Snow," I say hesitantly, "you don't think any of the old families could be behind this?" His eyes glint with anger as he turns to me, "I think they could be. I guess, if it's anyone, it's them." He turns his head down to his lap, then looks up to me again, "Baz? Do you think they're after me?"

 _ **AN: Hi again! Sorry it's been awhile since the last chapter, I didn't really have a plot set out then, but I have more of an idea now. I hope you're enjoying this, and reviews would be appreciated! ;)**_


	4. Chapter 4

**Simon**

Oh Crowley, they _are_ after me, aren't they? Honestly, that's the only explanation I can think of for this, and I just feel extremely guilty. Penny is having a real bad go of it, _because of me._ I mean, that's horrible, not what anyone needs in a friend. But I do think it is a little bit ridiculous that, after all that's happened, someone is still out to get me? I mean, can't they just let go. Oh Merlin, come to think of it, this all sounds a bit self absorbed, don't it? Maybe they aren't after me. No, surely not. Are they? Ugh, why can't I ever figure out anything. I really don't know now, but I know that if I'm to relieve any of my guilt, I _have_ to find her. And Baz will help me, which is lucky. He has at least twice as much brain power as I do.

 **Baz**

Snow is really freaking out at this. I can see it in his eyes, and by the way he runs his hand through his hair, ruffling it up, or starts biting his lip every so often. But I have a good idea of who I believe may have taken Bunce, so I tell him.

"Snow?"

"Hmm," he turns his head round slightly and I refocus my eyes on the road.

"Well, I think we need to head to Brighton." He makes a little huffing noise of uncertainty, and starts biting his lip again. "You see, I've heard that this family who own an estate there, the Blackbournes, may have been housing a Goblin with them for a little while."

"A Goblin?!" Snow exclaims, "Who the _bloody hell_ would live with a Goblin. And why would a Goblin live with _them_?"

"Well, that's what I had a bit of a ponder about," I say.

"Good thing you did. 'Cause I can't think of one bloody reason why something like that would ever happen," he mumbles. "Go on."

"Well, I know the Blackbournes have always been a fan of a good old exchange, a good deal. They convinced Father to trade a Ruby for 100 cows once, the git." Snow has an incredulous look on his face. "And I thought, maybe they've struck up a deal with the Goblin." I pull over by a rest stop. "If you need anything now's the time," I say, indicating outside, "It's about another 45 minutes to Brighton from here."

"Nah, I'm good," he says, so I go on.

"Basically, what I was considering, is that the Blackbournes may have agreed to let the Goblin stay there, in exchange for you, and probably something else too, because I know how greedy they are. So, essentially, they let the Goblin stay, and capture Bunce, to lure you there, so that the Goblin can kill you. Win win situation for both the Blackbournes and the Goblin: Goblin becomes King by killing you, and the Blackbournes get the glory of being an accessory to your death, and probably receive some form of treasure, too." Snow looks baffled. "Oh, and they kind of ran a drug ring in 70s, so they probably used some form of drug to get Bunce, if you were wondering."

"Crowley, you're smart," he utters, eyes wide. "Are you seriously telling me you made all those connections just before? I'm so lucky to have you." I smile a little, and he leans over and gives me a quick kiss.

"Now," he says, " let's go save Penny and not get me killed by a murderous Goblin and morbid rich folk."

 **Simon**

It's kind of a long drive to Brighton, and I begin to get a little twitchy. I can't stop thinking about when we get there, and what we'll do. If Penny isn't there, that will be very scary, but on the other hand, if she is, and if Baz is right (which he probably is), that'll be terrifying to. I'm going to have to rely a lot on Baz if there's any kind of struggle, like, if the family and the Goblin get to us. Obviously I can't just call on the Sword of Mages anymore, so I'll be relying completely on Baz skills with magic, and my bare hands. And even though Baz is a brilliant magician, that's kinda terrifying.

At some point I begin to sweat nervously, and Baz puts one hand on my forehead, keeping one on the other on the wheel.

"You okay?" He asks, stroking his thumb over my skin.

"Yeah, just like, a bit scared I guess. He brings his hand down, but keeps his arm outstretched, and I lean into it for a while before he returns it to the wheel.

"We're almost there. And we'll be fine."

I've been in enough awful situations over the years to learn that when people say it's gonna be fine, it's never fine. Once, when I was in a care home in the summer, a fire started in the night, but the adults still tried to reassure us everything would be alright. It most certainly would not, I thought, and said something along the lines of that. The housemother just glared at me and continued shuffling the other children out of there. So, the point is, I really wanted to trust what Baz said, but I couldn't.

 **Baz**

Snow is clearly unnerved as we arrive, and, even though I wouldn't show it- I need to be calm for him- I am too.

I park on the street, or, dirt lane, should I say, and as soon as we step out, Snow starts to shiver uncontrollably.

"Shit, Simon," I say. "Here, put my jacket on over yours- it's not like I'm even cold or anything." Which was true. He takes it, and even though it's a bit tight over his wing area, it makes him shiver less, and look a bit more comfortable.

"Thanks Baz," he says, and takes my hand. It is like that we enter what could possibly be one of the most hellish situations we ever have to face.

 **Simon**

The house is a little bit beautiful, in an ominous way. It's at least three stories high, and Victorian looking, a bit like Baz'. A couple windows are left wide open on the first floor, which kind of confirms Baz' theory for me, because, why else would anyone leave their windows open in a place like this, it would be like burglar heaven, and a surefire way to let insects and animals into your presumably very fancy home. We easily slip through one of the windows, and it's when we drop down on the hardwood flooring, that I realize, I do not have a bloody clue what our plan is here. I whisper this to Baz, and he tells me not to worry.

"Just follow me," he says, "and stay quiet."

 **Baz**

To be honest, the extent of my plan is not particularly grand. It pretty much goes like this:

Find the basement (undeniably where they will be keeping Penelope. No windows? Check. Creepy as? Check. Where people get killed in horror films? Check.)

Get Bunce.

Continue being quiet, and get the hell out of there.

It probably won't be as simple as that, but, that's all I come up with. They'll probably be waiting for us, the Goblin hiding out, ready to attack, so I have a good stunning spell in mind for anyone who appears.

I vaguely remember coming here when I was young, so I have a bit of an idea where the basement is. I lead Snow down the hall, gripping his hand with mine, and eventually we arrive at an ornate maroon door. The basement door- I remember it because I always thought it was particularly unsettling, partially because of its exterior, partially because of what was behind it. I open the door, and it's completely dark. It squeaks annoyingly as I widen it enough for us to slip through, and I can almost sense a shift in the house, a preparation for battle. I step through the door first, and quickly discover the lack of a step in front of me.

"Shit," I whisper, as I fall to the ground. Snow, bless him, does exactly the same thing after me, and lands on my stomach. It takes a lot of my strength not to emit a sound of pain.

 **Simon**

I land on top of Baz, and almost as soon as I stand up, feel a tap at my shoulder. I turn around, and there's Penny, lit up by her phone flashlight. I outstretch my arms to her, and she smiles and hugs me.

"Good to see you," she says, and Baz promptly shhhs. I think Penny glares at him a little.

I kind of wonder for a minute why Penny didn't just get the hell out of here herself, it seems a little out of character for her to need help, but as I go to walk up the stairs, assuming only one step was missing, I find out why. There are no stairs.

"Oh Crowley," I whisper. "Crowley, Crowley, Crowley." I turn to Baz. "Plan?" I ask.

"Unfortunately not," he replies. Our thoughts are soon interrupted though by the sound of footsteps, and then a ladder dropping to the basement floor. I have a bad feeling that this room may soon be a bloodbath.

 **Baz**

I don't wait for them to reach the floor, I just go for it.

"Stunned Mullet!" I shout, pointing my wand in the direction of the gnarly green being. It topples to the ground, unconscious. It astounds me that it was so unprepared for this fight, clearly it thought it would be easy. I gesture for the ladder, as Snow and Bunce are just standing there looking slightly stunned themselves. "Nice one," Bunce exclaims, and then follows me to the ladder.

"I know," I say smugly, and lead the way up.

Now, it's fairly obvious that Bunce does not have her ring on, otherwise I'm sure she would've found her way out of this situation already. Because of this, I am the only only one who can currently use magic, in this trio, and have quite a bit of responsibility. As we step out of the hallway, we are confronted with our primary obstacle on our way out of here- the Blackbournes. Clearly they had been hiding in the shadows waiting for something like this to happen.

"Hello, Simon." Mrs. Blackbourne exclaimed as she stepped out dramatically, but then she reeled back. "Oh, hello Basilton. What're you doing here?" I take Simon's hand.

"I'm here with Snow."

"Oh." She and Mr Blackbourne say at once. I don't believe I'll be needing my wand for this one anymore. I have an idea.

"I think you might have a bit of explaining to do," I prompt them.

"Yeah, bloody hell guys," Bunce adds, and I turn around and give her a bit of an I've got this glare. She raises an eyebrow.

"Hmm, well, I believe I could say the same to you," Mrs Blackbourne says.

"And what are you implying by that?" I ask.

"Well…" She gestures to mine and Snow's intertwined hands. I consider what to say next.

"All due respect Mrs. Blackbourne," I decide to say, "get over it." She looks taken aback. "In the grand scheme of things," I continue, "I believe the bigger problem is not my befriending Simon Snow, but rather, your attempt to get him murdered, in exchange for what, may I ask?" The Blackbournes ponder this for a minute.

"For your information we were given a very good deal, Basilton," Mr Blackbourne starts. "In exchange for assistance in your little friend here's death, we were given one of the greatest swords ever created by goblinkind."

"May I see it?" I ask, and Mrs. Blackbourne sends one of their children to fetch it. The Blackbournes never miss an opportunity to show off. While they're getting it I warn Snow and Bunce to step back.  
"This could be a prime opportunity for them to get at you," I explain, "and you're both unarmed."

The girl soon comes back carrying what is admittedly quite a beautiful sword. She hands it to me and I inspect it. It has little rubies lining the handle, and the blade is purely made of gold, shiny, only marked by tiny scars of battle and an engraving of the creator's signature (Yes, even medieval goblins had a signature).

"Hmm, quite impressive," I say, and they all beam. "Now," I continue, "I will give this sword back to you, but only if you agree to cause my friends and I no harm." I'm sure Bunce is using her death glare at this stage. "You know, I believe my father would be extremely unhappy with you, if he were to find out of any harm doing to me here. And harm to me includes harm to my friends." I take Simon's hand once more, and he gives mine a squeeze. "Deal?" I finish. "Oh, and you better give my friends ring back." I turn around and see Bunce smile, I bet she thought I'd forget about that.

The Blackbournes take a while to consider this. Mr and Mrs consult each other quietly, and obviously they conclude that my Father's anger at them would be less than ideal- no more rubies in exchange for cows, I suspect.

"Fine," Mr Blackbourne finally says. "We shall leave you and your friends be, but you must hand us back our sword before any of you move." Ah the Blackbournes, forever untrusting.

"Okay." I hand back their fine sword, they return Bunce's ring and they watch us go with a grimace on their faces. That was surprisingly simple.

 **Simon**

Sometimes my boyfriend is unbelievably cool. He just got us out of there that easily. I was like 80% sure I was going to be killed before. I give him a kiss before we step in the car, and I can feel him smile a little.

"Nicely done," Penny says to Baz, and I know that's a good acknowledgement going from Penny to Baz, considering he kind of took over, and Penny's not really into that. It was necessary though.

As we head home I can tell there will always be that bit of worry lingering in the back of our minds, but that's okay, I guess. I can handle that, because I've got Penny and I've got Baz- two amazing people by my side.

 _ **AN: I'll admit that was a little bit hellish to write- I kept putting it off- and probably a little low quality, but here it is! I hope you guys enjoyed, and were satisfied with the ending. Feel free to review, and I'm sorry it took so long- I honestly didn't think I'd ever do it, until I saw a review, and I just knew I had to do it. Thanks for sticking around! ;)**_


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